There are days where life is so unpredictable that it blows you out of the water. You land on the beach and just think, “What the fuck?” because somehow that is the only sentence your brain seems to be able to process. Today was that day.
I walked to work today. My bike ride has become too short. Not that the distance has changed, but my ability has changed. I need a longer amount of time to work my cardio and my muscles so rather than try and ride around the neighborhood a bit I’ve opted to walk at least once a week. The thing about walking is that somehow as my legs move one in front of the other my brain processes. It takes in the surrounding of birds, trees, traffic, the height of the sun and the temperature of the air. Perhaps it’s needless to say this, but I’m going to anyway. The walk is exactly what I need to be invigorated for work and writing. By the time I got to work this morning I had a good idea of writing down all these thoughts. I did an outline and then got busy with the workday.
Two-thirty p.m. Finally time for lunch. I was starving, but needed cash for both food AND for laundry so my first stop was the bank. I went up to a teller, gave her my info and….
“I’m sorry, but you are overdrawn.”
#1- WTF?!!! I just got paid. “How could that be?” I asked and the woman turned her screen toward me. There was a major…o.k. when I say major here I’m not trying to create drama. I actually mean MAJOR as in THOUSANDS!!!…withdrawal not of my making. #2- WTF!!??? I asked how that could be? That wasn’t a transaction I initiated and it’s completely against how I handle my account. Why wasn’t I called? How could this happen? Where is my money? Who took it? #3- WTF? #4- WTF? SHIT!!!! How do I resolve this?
“Ma’am, you can call our customer service to handle this issue. There is a phone over in the hallway.”
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I want a PERSON to explain this to me. A PERSON!!!!
“There are people to explain on the phone. Over in the hallway.” Yeah, thanks Betty I’m a WASP w/ a Japanese last name Tanaka. (yes, I’m naming crappy customer service reps names here.)
So, over to the hallway I go. The phone. The black phone of “customer service” place on a faux marble counter. I call *whatevertheextensionis and get a person. Of course I need to be transferred. NOOOOOOOOOO!!! THIS IS MY MONEY!!! I WANT A PERSON!!!
“Blahblahblahblahblah…3-10 business days. Blahblahblahblah…do you want someone to contact you about what we find?” says “Maggie.” I don’t even think she was real, but more like an automaton they gave a “eeeeeeeeee” name to. Mageeeeee. Mageeeeee. Gah.
#5 WHAT THE FUCK!!! YES, I DO WANT SOMEONE TO CONTACT ME. A REAL PERSON PREFERABLY
I hang up the black plastic customer service phone/Mageeeee and walk back to my office. My legs not invigorating my brain into though or resolution. It’s a chant of wtf? wtf? wtf? wtf? I get to work and customer service calls. “You have to fill out some paperwork at the branch and set up a new account.” Legs moving to the rhythm of wtf? going back to the bank.
“Hi. I’ve been robbed. Here is the fraud number.” Minutes. Phone calls. Stuff. Kind banker boy who has only worked at the bank 5 months and can at least pretend to care. No money. No money.
I have 3 to 10 business days before they resolve this. 3-10 business days. Three to ten…. That’s a long time. In the meantime I get to call the police, the FTC, the crime units at the police, the credit reporting agencies, anyone I have auto-withdrawals or auto-deposits with, the bank, the bank, the bank. #2000- WTF!!??
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